My husband is my polar opposite. I have a tendency to think with my heart and my husband is a think with his brain person. I see things half full and he will see them half empty. Many people wonder how in the world our marriage actually works for us. The truth of the matter is we are perfect for each other. We keep each other in balance. There are times however, that we have major problems. This usually happens when we both feel as though God is leading us in different directions.
This has happened to us a few times in our marriage. When going through these storms man was it hard. It felt at some points as though I was loosing my best friend. It wasn’t until we realized at the end of these periods of our struggle that is wasn’t that God was leading is in different directions in our marriage, but that He needed us to do different things for a common goal. One that we could not see till we reached the end marker, but one that we were so very glad that we stayed faithful and had continued to put God first.
It is extremely important when we go through these moments that we do not forget we are all still playing for the same team. It is never God’s desire to cause a rift in a marriage. In fact, He wants us both to cling to His will together in harmony. Now this does not mean that in our human nature that we will not have friction. It does however, mean that the friction is just our silly human nature poking its head into our marriage, which is not from God.
So the question remains how in the world do we reach a happy medium when we both feel as though we are following God’s direction, yet they seem like polar opposites?
- The very first thing we need to do is pray. Pray together and pray separately. We need to seek God’s guidance, we need to have God search each others hearts and we need to allow God to show us what will be pleasing to Him. This reminds both you and your husband that no matter what God is the center of your marriage and that no matter what you both want to do what is going to be pleasing to Him not yourself.
- Seek out your own heart. Are you personally making this a God-driven decision or are you doing this for your purposes? If I am honest…a lot of times I think that it is God’s will for me to do something, but when I search out my own heart I quickly realize I have more “all about me” things tangled into the reasoning.
- Sit down and fully listen. I am a horrible listener, when I think I am right and I am 100% certain my husband is wrong. Guess what this causes? Conflict. That is the last thing I want. A lot of times if we will simply sit down and listen to our husband we begin to see a bit more of God’s plan unfolding. I am in awe every time this happens.
- Have faith and trust in your spouse. You married them for a reason. You trusted them then when you invited them to spend their live with you and therefore sometimes you must step back and allow them to explore the direction God is leading them. This not only allows you both to grow in Christ, but also allows your marriage to grow. Don’t be afraid to even throw in a bit of praise and support while you’re at it.
The fact is – it doesn’t matter if you have been married 6 months or 60 years, there will be times that you will feel as though God is leading you in different directions. This happens because God is trying to teach you both something about each other and is using you both in ways He knows will be profitable to His Kingdom. The choice is ours, however; if we allow it to draw us closer together or if we allow it to separate us.
Until Next Time Just Keep Soaring 4 Him,
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