When I was a waitress I used to love waiting on older couples. I admired how they could complete each others sentences and they just always seemed to be on the same page. As I have noticed my own marriage slipping into this same stage, it brings me comfort. Sometimes, however, it can become a little too comfortable.
In day to day operations, it is so easy to forget that just because we have our forever mate, we must still maintain our marriage – just like we did in the beginning. We have to remember that every day we are meant and need to spend time striving to connect with our spouse in a positive way. We all know this and yet this is much often easier said than done. After all, marriages can become comfortable and still maintain the sparks we had in the early years, but we just have to be willing to work for it .
How are we suppose to keep that spark lit and still rock all our other responsibilities? Let me share with you what has worked in our marriage.
Connect with Him
Make sure to try to connect at some point during the day. We live in a fast-paced world. So fast, in fact, that we seem to forget that we actually need to stop every once in a while and connect with our husband. Send him a text message at some point just to see how his day is going and to let him know you are thinking of him.
Surprise him with his favorite meal or dessert. Men often times do so much and sometimes we forget to make a special effort to do something nice for them. If most of us are honest we cook 90% of our meals based off what our children want to eat. He will feel like the king of the castle dining on one of his favorite dishes for dinner.
Spruce up for Him
Break out of the normal and spruce up. I will admit it, I don’t dress the way I once did before we had children. However, when I do….My husband notices. Take time to fix your hair, do your make-up and put on one of his favorite outfits.
Schedule date nights in or out. I can not tell you how important these are. Lack of a babysitter should not hinder this. Make sure you are taking the time to grow your relationship together, even if it is ordering in pizza and watching a movie after the kids go to bed. But, don’t hesitate to get a sitter every once in a while and splurge for a night away from home!
Make Eye Contact with Him
Take time to make eye contact. Making eye contact increases interaction. I know it seems like a foreign concept now that we have all these nice things like computers, tablets, and cellphones but it is true. Making eye contact conveys a message of sincerity and shows him that you’re interested in his day and what he has to say.
Try New Things for Him
Be willing to step out of your comfort zone to try new things. My husband strongly dislikes standing in front of people and even more so if it involves singing. Yet, every Christmas he joins me to go Christmas caroling in various community nursing homes. I must confess it makes my heart flutter every single time. Therefore, it stands to reason that he likes it when I return the favor and actually do something that he enjoys.
Pray with Him and For Him
Make sure to take the time to not only pray with each other but for each other. Various times throughout the day, stop and pray for your husband. Pray for your marriage. Dare I say to even pray for ways that you can improve not only yourself, but your marriage. Ask him how you can pray for him today and then do it!
I hope that these tips help encourage and inspire you. I pray that you will discover that not only can you be comfortable in your marriage, but you can still have sparks as well.
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