What is Modesty?

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Modesty was not a problem for me growing up. As I’ve mentioned before in my story, I was anorexic, so tight fitting or short clothes was something I stayed away from. But as I got healthy, I started wearing tighter clothing. I wore this clothing through college and even for a while after I got married. Until one day…

What is Modesty? A set of rules and regulations? Long skirts? Find out my thoughts and how to decide for yourself what modesty is. :: www.inallyoudo.net

One day my husband told me that while he enjoyed seeing me in those clothes, he did not enjoy other men looking at me the way they did when I wore those clothes. Now, keep in mind I didn’t wear plunging necklines or skirts/shorts that barely covered my rear…they were just tighter than what he preferred me to wear in public. Thus began my journey to Biblical modesty.

Even though I got rid of the clothes my husband asked me not to wear, it wasn’t until we had our first daughter that I began seeing just how immodest our society had become. Boys were easy to dress – shirts, shorts (which were usually longer) and pants. Girls…not so much. As I shopped for our oldest daughter, I saw clothes in the girls section that even I wouldn’t wear. They were off the shoulder, seductive clothes being played off as “cute” for the sake of sales. I had a flash forward of life in 10 years and was absolutely HORRIFIED!

Being tall myself, I knew that my daughter would likely be tall as well. If she had long legs like me, it was going to be difficult to find shorts and even skirts to fit her modestly. I already knew the horror that lie ahead. I lived it. It was then that I started reading about modesty in the Bible and really listening to what God wanted me to do with my clothing.

After much prayer and discussion with my husband, we both decided that skirts would be the most modest for the girls in our family. Now…before you go accusing me of being “that girl” or “like the Duggars,” our decisions were made out of careful prayer, not legalistic rules that we needed to follow.

By no means do I think you must wear skirts only to be a Christian.

By no means do I think those who don’t wear skirts are sinners.

Modesty is a matter of the heart. Modesty is something between you, God and your parents or spouse as you study God’s word and seek His will for your life. Some may come to the conclusion of skirts only, while others may see no need to wear skirts all the time. It is a matter of the heart. This is something I have tried to stress to my daughters as they are getting older. One loves to wear skirts and dresses, while the other one wants to know why she always has to wear them and not pants like her brothers.

While we do own a few pairs of pants for the girls to wear when we feel they would be more modest than skirts – riding horses (for young girls), hiking, playing in the snow (under their snow suits), etc. – we still feel skirts are more appropriate for them to wear most of the time. We have explained this on their level and continue to teach them this is something Mommy and Daddy felt the Lord telling us to do.

As they get older, however, I want them to come to Modesty on their own. I don’t want to squash their personal sense of style with rules and regulations, but come to an understanding of modesty according to God’s word. That’s why I was SO excited to see this new 5-week Bible Study on Modesty from Lindsey of The Road to 31 and Richele of Under the Golden Apple Tree. While it is still too old for my girls, I am thrilled to see such a well thought out and put together study.

It's the Heart, Not the Hemline Unit Study on Modesty
As I read through the lessons, it was wonderful to see no rules cited or “dirty sinner” plastered throughout. This study is about allowing girls to see the way they dress through the Lord’s eyes, not the world. Through weekly Bible reading and verses, this study helps girls come to an understanding of what God’s word says about Modesty. This study is designed for a 5-week unit to be used 5 days a week – so 25 days total. This is a great study for parents and daughters to do together, as it is important for parents to discuss and talk with them about what they read. NOTE: As I suggest with most parent guided studies, do your best not to push a point of view on them, but allow them to read, explore and come to a conclusion on their own. Then you can discuss why it might be right or wrong. This gives them a sense of ownership in their findings, rather than more ‘rules’ laid down by Mom and Dad.

What I LOVE about It’s the Heart, NOT the Hemline:

  • The format – Not just the 5-week format, but also the Daily and Weekly breakdown. I also love the activities included to help guide them to an understanding of Biblical modesty. The reflection questions are a great way to open up conversation between daughters and parents as they walk through this study together.
  • Emphasis on Scripture – I love that this study includes so many great scriptures to not only memorize, but reflect on and dissect to fully see and understand God’s heart on the matter of modesty.
  • Samantha says… – This section at the end of every week is written by a 17-year old and gives great perspective from a peer. Samantha is wise beyond her years and does a wonderful job of concluding each week’s lessons with a relevant thought.
  • Age group – I know this may seem strange, but I love that this study can be used with girls as young as 7 or 8 up through high school. Some quick, simple tweeks and you have a wonderful study for young girls. Add in some additional Bible reading, journaling and possibly research and you’ve got a fantastic study for high schoolers.
  • Extras – there are so many extras in this study. From printable Scripture Cards to Memory Verse Games to different Activities such as DIY Spa Night recipes, a Prayer Log, Notes of Encouragement and Wall Art to use along this journey.

This study is absolutely FANTASTIC and needed in today’s society. Girls are being pushed and shoved in to immodest behavior and clothing for the sake of popularity and even love. Help your daughter realize that God has MORE planned for her life as a modest, Christian woman.

You can buy it now for just $15.99!! Now thru 10/8 use code: inallyoudo7 for $7 OFF!! That makes the total just $8.99 – what a STEAL!!!

OR Enter for your chance to win ONE COPY of It’s the Heart, NOT the Hemline!!

Giveaway ends 10/8/2015 at 11:59pm EST. This giveaway is in no way affiliated with or sponsored by Facebook, Pinterest or Twitter. Winner will be chosen at random by Giveaway Tools by 9am on 10/9/2015. Winner will be verified and notified within 24 hours. Winner has 72 hours to respond and claim their prize. If the first winner does not respond, a second winner will be chosen and given 72 hours to claim the prize.

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Annette has been married to her husband and best friend since 2003. Together they are raising their six children to follow the Lord’s will, no matter what. Annette longs for the day when she will meet all her angel babies who have entered heaven before her. She enjoys creating fun and engaging printables, unit studies and curriculum for homeschool families. You can follow her crazy life at In All You Do where she blogs about marriage, parenting, and homeschooling all while maintaining her sanity. She is also the owner of Thrifty Homeschoolers, where she shares free printables and resources from around the web as well as deals on curriculum and homeschooling resources. You can also keep up with her via Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and Pinterest.

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This Post Has 14 Comments

  1. Thank you for sharing about this Bible study. Being a mom of 3 girls, modesty is definitely a topic to consider in our house. I am thankful that my girls do not question my choices in their clothes very much (you are right, girls clothes are very hard to buy, even harder than finding cute and modest clothes for girls’ moms 🙂 ), and also want to lay a solid biblical foundation for the principles i teach them. thank you again!

  2. I would use this with my 11 yo daughter and then possibly with my American Heritage Girls. Thank you for offering this contest.

    1. What a WONDERFUL idea to use with your AHG group!! I love that! I can’t wait for my girls to be old enough to join!

  3. For me its little boys and girls wearing cloths way longer then they should. I see both in shirts that are not sold to be tight worn till they are skin tight. also arms above wrist and legs above ankles. they should have been out of them months ago. hold arms out to side. like a T. if sleeves are not longer then wrist bone, it is to small. Im fine with skinny shirts. and cleavage. as for skirts, dresses. to each his own family. but pushing your kid can backfire big time as they get older. I have seen it happen way to often. as she gets in teens if she still wants pants, I personally would find something I was ok with. we live in society, they do to, we have to biblical meet people where they are. I study fashion. its interesting to look back and see what was bad to show. 1800 it was ankles! but chest showing some was ok.Ankles!!!!!!! come on.

    1. It is funny to think of what used to be “scandalous” in fashion. LOL And we will never push our kids to wear clothes, but we do hope they grow to understand why we have made the choices we have in clothing. She doesn’t mind skirts so long as she can wear leggings. She’s a climber, flipper and loves to be outside, so I encourage the leggings. 😉

  4. I would use it with my two daughters. Sounds like an awesome study!

  5. I saw this on Pinterest. I have three little girls and we talk a lot about dressing to please the Lord. A study like this would be lovely to do together.

    1. WONDERFUL!! I’m so glad you found us and this study. It really is beautifully done! Good luck!

  6. I would like to purchase a copy of the following study but in downloadable pdf format. Is it available?
    Five Week Study on Modesty.

    1. I believe it is a PDF, but let me verify Gretchen.

    2. Yes, Gretchen. It is a PEF!! 🙂 I hope it is a blessing to you!

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